The Wheel of the Year

This year I spent Lammas day at my favorite beach before heading home to make dinner with friends.

As a child, I remember the feeling I’d get in late summer. Each year I’d feel an imperceptible shift signaling the beginning of the end of summer. It was never anything I could explain or specifically identify, but I felt that little something extra that told me that change was afoot. It’s still the seasonal shift that I feel most strongly each year and leads me into anticipation of my favorite season: Autumn.

In high school I sent my first Groundhog Day card to my mom. It was hand-drawn with markers. I just loved the idea of celebrating a small adorable-mammal, particularly a quirky one who predicts the weather. A holiday that whimsical deserved to be playfully observed!

Ten years after sending my first Groundhog Day card, I stumbled across The Wheel of the Year - a modern neo-pagan mashup of some of the ancient practices of our fore-mothers and fathers. It resonated with me right away. There before my very eyes I was seeing the scaffolding that propped up my lived experience in both secular and Christian traditions, as well as my own lived observations of the natural world around me. Groundhog Day in the United States is Candlemas to the church and Imbolc on the Wheel of the Year. All are a hoped-for anticipation and celebration of the return of Spring and the light. That feeling I got each year as summer barely began to wane was marked on the Wheel by Lammas. I couldn’t believe that others had named this almost imperceptible sensory experience I’d felt since childhood! Secular Halloween and the Christian All Saints Day find their roots in Samhain (prounounced sow-en). And the 12 Days of Christmas find their roots in Yule.

I have a deep love and inclination towards the rhythm of seasonal ritual. Having grown up in a liturgical Christian tradition - meaning we followed a church calendar with designated holy days each year - I watched as altar cloths, candles and banners were changed with each shift in season and extra services and special rituals were performed: Ash Wednesday, Lent, Advent, etc. By observing these behaviors, I learned the value of seasonal ritual.

Upon discovering the Wheel of the Year, I was fascinated to catch glimpses of ancient ancestral ways through modern interpretations. My interest was particularly piqued given its Celtic and Anglo-Saxon roots as one whose ancestors come from the British Isles on both sides of my family tree. [The origins of The Wheel are varied. Anglo-Saxons celebrated the solstices and equinoxes and the Celts celebrated the seasonal divisions - the days offset from the solstices and equinoxes (February, May, August, and November) - with various fire festivals. The modern Wheel is a conglomeration of dates from both folk traditions]. I dove in to study it more and as I did, I learned about how humans across all cultures have celebrated harvests and held fears and superstitions of the darker fallow seasons - wondering if they’d survive them.

Finding commonalities across time and cultures, I felt how universal the human condition is: the work and struggle for survival, the hope for brighter days, the optimism in healthy animals and growing plants each spring, the gratitude for the nourishment they bring, and the careful preparation for the next dark fallow season to come. These rhythms of life have allowed for our physical survival as humans and they teach us how to survive the emotionally dark times of our lives as well. We gather in community to support and help one another, we hope for brighter days when times are dark and difficult, and we celebrate the good times and soak them up as they come to us.

As someone who loves nature dearly, The Wheel has also given me a framework for observing my plant and animal neighbors more closely as well. Because it is so agrarian and survival focused, I consider my friends outside my window more thoughtfully. When do the birds leave for warmer climes? When do the first nettles begin unfurling their prickly green leaves? When do the trees lose their leaves or come into flower and fruit? Have our neighborhood raccoons had a litter of cubs yet? They are all on the same path as us - an ongoing cycle of death and rebirth, of hope and loss, of growth and rest. Each year we have the opportunity to walk with them as we follow them round the Wheel and to learn (or relearn) lessons on how to live well, to live fully, and to live with understanding, acceptance, and grace.

The Wheel is our pattern for living. It is a mindfulness tool to teach us how to live well and that to everything there is a season. Based on our best interpretation of old ways - long forgotten and re-imagined for modern times - it is rooted in history and giving fruit to us in the present.

Fun Food

Frito pie, pigs in a blanket, green bean bacon wraps (with a brown sugar glaze!), Caramel Delite Girl Scout cookies, guacamole with pan-fried corn tortillas, hard ciders, kombucha and a sandwich cake. These are the indulgent components of a Super Bowl spread for two. I am not one of those two.

While I don’t care a whit about football, I do love an excuse for ritual around food and fellowship and the Super Bowl gives that gift to me each year. We always set aside the day for making some sort of indulgent meal full of what we call ‘fun food.’ Fun Food can be as simple as boxes from the freezer aisle (like frozen pizza for Benjamin and frozen gluten-free corndogs for me) or crockpot-pulled-pork nachos. It’s the kind of rich, indulgent fare that scratches the urge for junk food that we don’t usually make for ourselves.

Yesterday’s menu was decided on by Benjamin and his mom and shared between them. While they feasted on rich delicacies, I had to get creative about turning my regular fare into something a little more fun and exciting for the festive occasion. Since the end of June my digestive system’s been quite ill. With plenty of visits to the doctor over the course of 3 months, I got things stabilized by sticking to my prescribed diet, taking a few supplements as needed, and creating a rather extensive daily self-care routine. While it was harder to stick to specific parts of my diet and self-care once we hit the road, I modified things the best that I could to ensure I stayed on track. My goal was singular: to be healed enough to enjoy traditional Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners with family.

Thanksgiving went well, but Christmas (four of them) was much more indulgent and then my birthday followed just a week later. By the start of January my symptoms were returning. Stupidly, I stubbornly ignored them because I was in denial - naturally this only made things worse. In painful desperation I returned strictly to my prescribed diet two weeks ago and I haven’t looked back. Slowly I’m gaining ground, but it’s more of a lifestyle commitment than a quick fix and I absolutely can’t afford to make any compromises (the Denial ship has sailed and I am now fully on board with Acceptance of my situation!).

Still though, the ritual around fun food is a cherished one - so the question became ‘how can I make my prescribed diet feel more festive?’ Here’s what I can eat these days - for every lunch and dinner this is pretty much what I’ve eaten the last two weeks: baked fish, baked sweet potato, and this thing called ‘green composite’ in which I cook the heck out of leafy veggie greens for over an hour then puree them with a couple of other ingredients including a fresh, uncooked herbal kind of green. I use ghee and prescribed salt and herbs to season my food.

Another facet to my digestive woes is that I absolutely cannot go too long between meals under any circumstances or it will start to make me feel ill again. Luckily I’ve found that basic Lara bars (no chocolate) sit well enough with me if I eat them slowly. A bar can get me through an oncoming attack if I’m out running errands and can’t get a meal in my stomach right away. These days I don’t leave the house without a Lara Bar (or two) in my bag. The last component of my eating these days is almond milk. If I’m still feeling a little hungry after a snack, I’ll have a swig of unsweetened almond milk. It’s filling and it hasn’t upset my stomach.

So there was my challenge: how to make a festive, indulgent meal out of those items alone. I’m very pleased to say I totally pulled it off! I started by making a fresh green-composite. While I rotate my cooked veggie greens each time I make it, I’ve only found cilantro palatable for the fresh herbal green (parsley was just way too strong!). But there’s also delicious, tasty, beautiful basil. I love basil so much, I just don’t use it regularly because it’s so much more expensive than cilantro. But for a festive game-day meal, basil was the perfect indulgent component!

So with my fish, sweet-potato, and greens fortified with delicious basil I was left to solve the conundrum of drinks and dessert. For dessert I cut up the four Lara Bars that I can eat into small squares and heaped a bowl full of them. This allowed for the indulgence of a little something sweet, in tiny bite-sized pieces, with a mix of flavors (a surprise in every bite!) and I could just snack on a few (since I certainly didn’t need to eat a whole bar in addition to my meal). It worked out perfectly! It was also a dessert that others would enjoy. Contributing to the spread and sharing with others made me feel more like part of the party.

When we were traveling in southern California last November we pulled into a Whole Foods because I found myself in need of putting something in my stomach right away. While browsing for readymade food and drink that I could travel with I discovered individual-sized date-sweetened almond milk and I was filled with so much excitement and joy! When basically all I can drink is water, herbal tea, unsweetened almond milk, and aloe vera gel (and I’m so, so tired of water and herbal tea from drinking it so much) you can bet that finding a travel-sized serving of creamy almond milk that was made with legal ingredients was such an exciting highlight for me!

Yesterday, in a grocery store in west Texas, I walked by an end-cap full of kombucha and stopped to pick one out for Benjamin. There in the top, right corner was that same brand of Californian almond milk! I bought two of them and added them to my meal like I’d found the crowning glory to my festive feast (which, let’s be honest, I had).

After 6.5 hours of grocery shopping followed by crafting the festive contribution for others that was most certainly not on my diet, I heated up my fish and sweet-potatoes (baked the day before), added my fresh-made basil greens, chopped up my Lara Bars, and selected the most indulgent of the two almond milks and sat down to enjoy the final minutes of the football game.

I’m most delighted to say that I succeeded. The food was savory and delicious, the Lara Bars were a sweet treat, and the creamy golden almond milk was a chai-lover’s dream. I ate all the food on my plate, just a few of the Lara Bar pieces, and about 2/3 of the almond milk, and it all sat pretty decently in my tummy. Truly a massive success and one of which I’m most proud.

In the early weeks of January during my Denial period I kept eating the rich indulgent foods offered to me because I so badly wanted the delicious food and the fellowship that came with it. But it only made things worse. I’m much more satisfied by accepting the current situation and putting my creativity to the test to find a solution that makes me feel both indulgent and part of the fellowship all at the same time. As Benjamin often reminds me, ‘creativity likes constraints.’ It led me to a winning situation where my body, mind and heart were all nurtured and delighted.

The Stirring of Spring Yet to Come

Over the last year, I fell away from my spiritual practices. Anxiety, discouragement and disillusionment crafted a wedge to pull me away from people and practices that were once a source of light, strength and hope. This shadow phase did prove helpful in its own way (as shadow periods tend to do). It helped filter out voices that had grown too loud and influential in my life and got me back to the basic essentials for healthy spiritual practice.

But I sure have missed it - the introspection, celebration, and reflection that marks each seasonal turn of the year. Even the high holidays of Samhain and Yule went by last year with very little ritual, although I did find small ways to commemorate each day. Waking this morning on the eve of Imbolc, I felt the stirring of Spring yet to come. I felt a readiness to reconnect and root myself in spiritual practices again and I’m so grateful for it. My weariness is now replaced with hunger. I was weary and disillusioned with the [harmful] dismantling of systems and communities that I witnessed during the last year. Now I’m hungry to reconnect with the systems and communities who remain after the dismantling.

Several years ago when I first found this lovely, wandering path, I picked up the Llewellyn’s Sabbats Almanac to become better acquainted with each seasonal turn of the year. It was so helpful to me as I began to understand roots and contexts for observations, feelings and practices I’d long been observing already, some of them since childhood. After many months away from spiritual practice I find myself on the road, untethered from the ritual and routine that a home can provide. So once again I turned to the same book to help me step readily into the mindset of the season.

I’m grateful for books that I can download straight to my iPad and start reading right away, even as I’m far away from like-minded folk. I’m grateful that summarized compendiums such as these exist for beginners and regular spiritual practitioners alike. I’m grateful that my appetite for ritual and practice has returned, this time on more assured footing.

Because we are traveling tomorrow on Imbolc, I’m making the most of Imbolc Eve. I’m cleaning out the disorder from my current living space (a guest room) and wrapping up loose ends on some smaller unfinished projects to free up my energy for larger creative tasks that need my attention.

Tomorrow morning I’ll rise early for some straightening, ritual cleaning and small ceremony in our vehicle, our constant, homey companion over these last few months regardless of which guest rooms we frequent intermittently. I’m looking forward to spending that time with her and giving her that gift - she’s so much happier as a beloved, lived-in home than as only a vehicle for transport.

In addition to practical and ritual cleaning, I’m also letting go of unhealthy relationships and opening myself up to wholesome ones based on love, respect, acceptance and mutual trust. In all these ways I’m making way for the coming Spring - for light and life and growth. It feels good to be budding again.

Things to Remember About my BiRthDaY!

Yesterday was my birthday! I woke up late after a late night of game playing. Mysteriously, Benjamin knew when I awoke, because shortly thereafter he came into the room with a big poster he made from recycled wrapping paper that said “HAPPY BIRTHDAY HILARY!” on it. I loved it so much. Upon seeing it I said to him, “Yes! I will marry you again!”

As I got dressed, I braced myself for an unlit tree. I’ve never lived with anyone who remembers to turn on the tree  each day and my biggest Christmas peeve is an unlit tree. I always give them a hard time and fuss that people who don’t turn on the tree obviously hate Christmas. I wondered if anyone would have made an effort since it is my birthday, but I wasn’t holding my breath.

I walked into the living room and Benjamin, my brother, and dad were already there. My brother jumped up from the couch and ran across the room. Was he coming for me? It seemed uncharacteristic. No, he was headed past me towards the Christmas tree to turn the lights on! He saw my usual trajectory to head over to light the tree, intercepted me, and plugged the lights in for me for my birthday! He declared with relief “whew! I barely made it!” We all got a good laugh out of it. And I felt really loved!

With the world icy and slippery outside, we all enjoyed a quiet day indoors. Unfortunately I’ve not been feeling too great for the last few days, so the quiet day was appreciated (although I wish I’d felt well enough to enjoy my birthday with more flair!).

The next highlight of my day occurred when my mom brought the phone to me for my grandmother to give her birthday salutations. She told me of her memory of driving across the state through thick fog when I was born. They arrived a day later than planned because of the fog, having to stopover for the night instead of driving on through. They stayed about a week and she got to help take care of me during that time. I’d never heard that story before (that I could remember) so it was very special to hear.

After lunch I walked down to see her and to take her a birthday cupcake. I sat with her for a good long while and she shared stories about my great grandparents and answered questions about them. I relish these stories because she’s my last grandparent and I know these stories will end when she goes from us. Sometimes I think I’ll write notes down about them, but they’re so not the same as hearing her tell them herself. So instead of worrying about what will be lost in the someday future, I focus on savoring our precious time in the present. My visit with her was one of the two best things about my birthday.

The other best thing about my birthday was the thoughtful presents that Benjamin surprised me with. He got me a 4D Model Snail and I spent the rest of the afternoon examining the different body parts, assembling the snail, and reading and researching about snail organs and how they work. It was the perfect low-key activity for this introvert who wasn’t feeling too well to still get to feel celebratory while also getting to relax. I loved it so much. I’ve learned a lot from my time with the snail yesterday and I’ve been savoring it’s company on my bedside table ever since.

He also got me some modeling clay and wrote up some project ideas for me to do with the clay. Last year I realized for the first time how limited my exposure to art education had been during my upbringing. It helped me understand why I gave up on certain aspects of my creativity at a young age, believing some things to be impossibly out of reach for me. Having gained an understanding around that, I’ve felt bolder about tackling art skills that I want to learn.

Benjamin’s upbringing was very much the opposite. There was never a time when art education wasn’t emphasized in some way, which culminated in him going to an art school for his college education. He was stunned to realize how unique his opportunities were and became eager to share exercises with me that he had the privilege of doing throughout his early art education. The clay is part of that desire of his. He’s given me a chance to get my fingers messy and play around with no expectations about being ‘good enough’ but instead to just enjoy creating while trying a new medium. He took the guesswork out of me having to know what to do with the clay by giving me assignments he know I would enjoy. It was a very thoughtful gift and an investment in my dreams as a growing artist.

As is the usual way of things in my family, my birthday was accompanied by the retelling of the story of the day I was born. These are other stories I treasure. How my mom didn’t eat all day because she knew the baby was coming and they told her not to have a full tummy when in labor. How by dinner she was starving and said she wouldn’t make it through the delivery without some energy so my dad made meatloaf, potatoes, and green beans. How she delayed calling the hospital because she was worried that she’d have the doctor she didn’t like. Once she called she was relieved to learn that her preferred doctor was on call that night instead. She waited at home until the contractions were the right amount apart to head for the hospital and I was born that night, two hours later. The nurse asked my dad if he’d like to carry me down to the nursery. He did and when he got there they offered him a rocker to sit in with me for a while. He sat and rocked me and sang to me my first lullabies before handing me over into the nurses’ care.

Usually this story gets told at night, at the stroke of my birth time (and since I’ve left home, I always call home at the right moment so as to keep the tradition intact). This year we did it after presents instead. So we were all sitting quietly together, each working on our own projects or playing handheld games when my birth time came to pass. I’d been watching the clock and announced to everyone when the time had come. My family all wished me a happy birthday and then I stated that my first act as a thirty-six year old would be to go to bed and I happily excused myself, said goodnight, and enjoyed a great night’s sleep! :)

Things to Remember About the New Year

On the 30th, we spent the whole afternoon (and into the night) with my oldest dear friend, Shanna. She took us around the town to show us some really wonderful ways my hometown (and hers) has evolved over the years since we’ve been gone. She low-key sold us on all the town has to offer and I have to admit, one could make a lovely (and affordable) life here. After seeing the children’s storybook gardens we sat in a great local coffee shop and visited. Then we went to a local spot for dinner and visited even more. It’s the first time in years that the three of us have gotten to hang out together (since I always travel home alone, she and I catch up annually without Benjamin). I was so glad to have us all three in the same place at the same time!

On New Years Eve, we went into town with my brother and sis-in-law (SIL) to run some errands together. In addition to running actual errands we also lingered on the LEGO aisle at Target for a while and looked at various games and puzzles we could play with. After dinner together, we met up with Shanna and a couple of her friends for a screening of the movie “Big” at the local historic Paramount Theatre. Thirty years ago she and I were ballerinas together at that old theatre and it was so good to be back in that grand space, especially with someone who shares similar cherished memories. We enjoyed reminiscing together.

During intermission a pianist came out and filled the theater with live music. My brother and I were absolutely floored that it was the same piano player that always played at the town’s best pizza joint back when we were kids! In a world that feels like it’s always changing so quickly (rampant development in Seattle with skyrocketing rents along with plenty of development in the country town my mom grew up in) it was deeply comforting to see that some things stay the same. 💛

We savored coffee and visiting after the movie then came home to watch the New Years Eve broadcasts on TV, which has become a tradition for me and my SIL to do together.

My brother 110% won this round and also made me laugh. Playing possum has always been one of my favorite things to do. And still is!

New Years Day is also SIL’s birthday! She and I baked lemon cupcakes together that we topped with chocolate icing and a cherry. The four of us kids (me, Benjamin, brother and SIL) played Forbidden Island (it’s my favorite game. It was the first time we played with more than two players and it was much more of a challenge! It was so fun.) Then we played Telestrations (this time with the parents) followed by three hours of Apples to Apples! We all laughed so much and enjoyed the many hours of games together. It was a great way to celebrate her birthday.

Tomorrow is my birthday and I am ready for it. I’m not feeling very well, which I’m rather discouraged about. But still, I’m looking forward to the day. I hope I’m not too tired from staying up so late playing games this evening. :)

Wrapping Up Christmas 2018

Yesterday we wrapped up our fourth and last Christmas of 2018.

For seven Christmases it’s been just us 3 up in Seattle, and it’s been great. We always share Christmas Day together at home and make a lot of our traditional favorite foods. The day after, I often fly to Texas to spend the week between Christmas and my birthday with my family.

But this year, for the first time since we moved, we came home for the holidays. We planned extended travel time so that we could drive down and be here for Thanksgiving, Christmas, Birthdays, and beyond. It’s the first time we’ve been home for the holidays together since we moved, and the first time Benjamin and I have been home together at the same time in over five years.

After Thanksgiving (plus a couple of weeks) with my family, we traveled to spend Christmas with Benjamin’s family. We savored 3 Christmases with them, each with different (but overlapping) family groupings. Each gathering was all food and fellowship without the exchange of presents (except for the little ones) so it was super stress-free. We played games, ate delicious food, and enjoyed lengthy visits. It was *such a treat* to be with everyone.

Yesterday, as per my annual holiday routine, we came back to my parents for post-Christmas, New Year, and Birthdays (my sis-in-law (SIL) and I share birthdays one day apart!).We exchange small presents with my family, which range from handmade to practical to fun. This year more than one of us had the idea to give little LEGO sets, and I got us all a Nintendo Classic to share.

So we spent our day playing with Legos and watching each other play nostalgic Nintendo games. It was a Christmas straight out of Christmases past! When we were kids, a perfect Christmas consisted of Legos and Nintendo. Turns out that’s still what constitutes the perfect Christmas for these kids!

Things I want to be sure to remember:

• Us four kids, ages 32-37, all in the floor playing with Legos before lunch and again through the afternoon. My brother and I also dug out some of our old Legos of yore and using those random pieces he master-crafted custom stuff straight out of his imagination until about 1am.

• During the afternoon, we watched my brother own Megaman like he still plays it all the time when in reality it’s been more like 20 years since he’s played. My mom made popcorn and we sat and watched the impressive show as he steadily marched towards the final boss. Between me and my brother’s shared memories of the game, we remembered all the tricks to it, and he executed them impressively!

• My mom played Super Mario Brothers for the first time ever and was so animated about all her missteps. It was so fun and funny to watch!

Amidst watching each other play Nintendo (and each of us playing it ourselves in turns) and as my brother continued to play with Legos well into the night, we all visited, Benjamin and my SIL worked on a jigsaw puzzle, and I read vintage cookbooks and took notes on recipes I want to try while my mom read a vintage 5th grade songbook I found a couple of weeks ago. We also pulled out my and Benjamin’s wedding album and then my parents’ album, and showed them to my SIL to give her ideas for what she wants for hers.

It was the perfect Christmas Day. My favorite people to share gifts with. Gifts that kept on giving all day long and late into the night such that we didn’t even realize how late it had gotten. Gifts that created the background noise for visits and stories and photo-reminiscences. Legos and [grown] kids spread across the living room floor like old times all under the glow of the Christmas tree.

Christmas this year was richly abundant in fellowship, food, and memory-making. I’ll remember the 2018 Christmas season for many years to come.

Christmas 3 of 4

Benjamin and I exchanged tiny stockings this year. We used Christmas kid’s socks for stockings since smaller stockings mean there’s much less to fill. Our tree is made of discarded branch clippings from my parents’ tree with ribbon I braided and stars my mom crocheted for me. Brass bells too heavy for the tiny tree are hung on the milk bottle instead. We exchanged our stockings after we woke up this morning and then helped Pepper open his.

We spent Christmas Day with my in-laws’ in-laws. They’re a generous and hospitable bunch and it’s been years since we’ve celebrated with them. It was such a treat to be in their company. Besides delicious food and good company, there are a few things I will savor above the general joy of the day.

After lunch my little six-year-old niece came up to me, addressed me by my name, and asked me for a favor in the sweetest voice. It’s the first time I’ve heard her call me by name and I positively melted. She and I have a pen-pal relationship, but I haven’t seen her in person since she was about 6-months old. She’s a remarkable child and I’ve so enjoyed getting to know her during this trip.

I love Benjamin’s brother like he’s my own, and watching him parent our niece is truly wonderful. He’s so attentive, kind, proud, patient, firm, fun, and gentle. He’s all the wonderful things a parent should be. I’m so proud to see him be such a great dad.

We got hours of uninterrupted visiting time with Benjamin’s brother and sis-in-law both, which was a really special gift. I feel like I know both of them better now. I have a helluva lot of respect for them and the ways they’re raising our niece (she is such a lucky, lucky girl to have such thoughtful, compassionate, empowering parents). And we got to compare notes and understand how much we have in common and build bridges over shared concerns. All of that was a real gift.

On a lighter note, there was a Christmas popper at each place-setting which was just plain fun. I’ve never popped one before. Mine contained a plastic blue harmonica and I wore my orange paper crown all day long until it fell off and I accidentally stepped on it!

Christmas 1 of 4

We’re in Texas for the holiday season, so for the first time in seven years, we’re joining our families for all the festivities. Today was our first Christmas gathering and there are so many things I don’t want to forget about Christmas 1 of 4.

After everyone finished eating lunch, Pepper’s uncle asked if he could go get Pepper out of his room and hold him at the dinner table while we all visited. He held Pepper for a long time and gave him a good and proper massage. It made my heart happy to see Pepper so loved. They share the same middle name, which the internet once told me is the name meaning “happy friend.”

For 30-45 minutes I danced nonstop to the nutcracker soundtrack on cassette with my 6 year-old niece (whom I’d never met before) in the back bedroom. I also had the privilege of explaining to her who Benjamin and I were (she thought Benjamin was “daddy’s friend”). Then she told me: “Benjamin is a weird name. Cute but weird.” (That assessment just keeps making me laugh!) We looked at a map together and I showed her where we live compared to where she lives and all the states we drove through to come visit her. I also got to teach her how to work a cassette player, which was a privilege indeed.

Sometimes you don’t want to forget things because they’re so wonderful. Other times you don’t want to forget them so that you can make better choices in the future! Despite some efforts to practice smidges of dietary self-care today, everything was so tasty that I ate way too much and gave myself quite a stomach ache! Yesterday I baked lovely gluten-free sugar cookies and I ate way too many of those delicious bad boys today. All day long they were pure melt-in-your-mouth buttery goodness. Now they’re only regret!

Benjamin overdid it in his own way, so tonight I was on my phone searching for any kind of internet relief I could find. Even a placebo was acceptable. I just needed anything to help me feel like I was doing something to improve our situation! This led me to “yoga poses that undo overeating” on Cosmo.com, so I invited Benjamin to join me.

The poses did help some, but then we sat around afterwards and talked about Marvel Avengers stuff and speculated and laughed. Honestly I think that did more to improve my situation than anything simply because it took my mind off my misery.

So here’s to uncles who show love to their furry nephews, nieces to meet and dance endlessly with, and lovers to commiserate, cope and be miserable with. Christmas 1 of 4 was a wild success!