Yesterday was my birthday! I woke up late after a late night of game playing. Mysteriously, Benjamin knew when I awoke, because shortly thereafter he came into the room with a big poster he made from recycled wrapping paper that said “HAPPY BIRTHDAY HILARY!” on it. I loved it so much. Upon seeing it I said to him, “Yes! I will marry you again!”
As I got dressed, I braced myself for an unlit tree. I’ve never lived with anyone who remembers to turn on the tree each day and my biggest Christmas peeve is an unlit tree. I always give them a hard time and fuss that people who don’t turn on the tree obviously hate Christmas. I wondered if anyone would have made an effort since it is my birthday, but I wasn’t holding my breath.
I walked into the living room and Benjamin, my brother, and dad were already there. My brother jumped up from the couch and ran across the room. Was he coming for me? It seemed uncharacteristic. No, he was headed past me towards the Christmas tree to turn the lights on! He saw my usual trajectory to head over to light the tree, intercepted me, and plugged the lights in for me for my birthday! He declared with relief “whew! I barely made it!” We all got a good laugh out of it. And I felt really loved!
With the world icy and slippery outside, we all enjoyed a quiet day indoors. Unfortunately I’ve not been feeling too great for the last few days, so the quiet day was appreciated (although I wish I’d felt well enough to enjoy my birthday with more flair!).
The next highlight of my day occurred when my mom brought the phone to me for my grandmother to give her birthday salutations. She told me of her memory of driving across the state through thick fog when I was born. They arrived a day later than planned because of the fog, having to stopover for the night instead of driving on through. They stayed about a week and she got to help take care of me during that time. I’d never heard that story before (that I could remember) so it was very special to hear.
After lunch I walked down to see her and to take her a birthday cupcake. I sat with her for a good long while and she shared stories about my great grandparents and answered questions about them. I relish these stories because she’s my last grandparent and I know these stories will end when she goes from us. Sometimes I think I’ll write notes down about them, but they’re so not the same as hearing her tell them herself. So instead of worrying about what will be lost in the someday future, I focus on savoring our precious time in the present. My visit with her was one of the two best things about my birthday.
The other best thing about my birthday was the thoughtful presents that Benjamin surprised me with. He got me a 4D Model Snail and I spent the rest of the afternoon examining the different body parts, assembling the snail, and reading and researching about snail organs and how they work. It was the perfect low-key activity for this introvert who wasn’t feeling too well to still get to feel celebratory while also getting to relax. I loved it so much. I’ve learned a lot from my time with the snail yesterday and I’ve been savoring it’s company on my bedside table ever since.
He also got me some modeling clay and wrote up some project ideas for me to do with the clay. Last year I realized for the first time how limited my exposure to art education had been during my upbringing. It helped me understand why I gave up on certain aspects of my creativity at a young age, believing some things to be impossibly out of reach for me. Having gained an understanding around that, I’ve felt bolder about tackling art skills that I want to learn.
Benjamin’s upbringing was very much the opposite. There was never a time when art education wasn’t emphasized in some way, which culminated in him going to an art school for his college education. He was stunned to realize how unique his opportunities were and became eager to share exercises with me that he had the privilege of doing throughout his early art education. The clay is part of that desire of his. He’s given me a chance to get my fingers messy and play around with no expectations about being ‘good enough’ but instead to just enjoy creating while trying a new medium. He took the guesswork out of me having to know what to do with the clay by giving me assignments he know I would enjoy. It was a very thoughtful gift and an investment in my dreams as a growing artist.
As is the usual way of things in my family, my birthday was accompanied by the retelling of the story of the day I was born. These are other stories I treasure. How my mom didn’t eat all day because she knew the baby was coming and they told her not to have a full tummy when in labor. How by dinner she was starving and said she wouldn’t make it through the delivery without some energy so my dad made meatloaf, potatoes, and green beans. How she delayed calling the hospital because she was worried that she’d have the doctor she didn’t like. Once she called she was relieved to learn that her preferred doctor was on call that night instead. She waited at home until the contractions were the right amount apart to head for the hospital and I was born that night, two hours later. The nurse asked my dad if he’d like to carry me down to the nursery. He did and when he got there they offered him a rocker to sit in with me for a while. He sat and rocked me and sang to me my first lullabies before handing me over into the nurses’ care.
Usually this story gets told at night, at the stroke of my birth time (and since I’ve left home, I always call home at the right moment so as to keep the tradition intact). This year we did it after presents instead. So we were all sitting quietly together, each working on our own projects or playing handheld games when my birth time came to pass. I’d been watching the clock and announced to everyone when the time had come. My family all wished me a happy birthday and then I stated that my first act as a thirty-six year old would be to go to bed and I happily excused myself, said goodnight, and enjoyed a great night’s sleep! :)